Retirement is more like cooking than math
The skills that make you a good cook may also make you better at retirement
I’ve always preferred cooking without a recipe. Look at what’s on hand in the fridge, freezer and pantry, throw it in a skillet and whip up something yummy. Lately I’ve been applying that to my recent plant-focused eating, and I’m finding I need to learn some new concepts. I’d much rather understand the basics than be tied to a specific recipe. My latest lessons have been in Indian cooking, as I got a lovely Indian spice “masala dabba” for Mother’s Day and was itching to try it out.
Instead of hunting for recipes that matched exactly what I had on hand, I headed to Chat GPT and told it what I had (spices, onions, garlic, tomatoes, lentils) and got some guidance on building a dish. While building that first home-made Indian dish (a version of Madras lentils), I learned key concepts that will serve me with every future recipe.
I learned the importance of cooking the onions far longer than I usually would—not quite caramelized, but soft, sweet, and deeply savory. I learned to temper the spices, filling the house with an amazing aroma for the rest of the evening, and to layer flavors gradually, giving each ingredient time to settle into the dish before adding the next. Most importantly, I learned to substitute with my own principles in mind – much of Indian cuisine’s richness comes from cream and butter or ghee, which are not part of my lower-fat, plant-based diet. So my plan was to substitute a plant-based yogurt, only to realize what I had was vanilla flavored – yuck, not for a savory dish! – time to pivot to a splash of coconut milk.
The lentils were amazing, and the experience was so satisfying.
It occurred to me that I’ve favored this type of learning in most areas of my life, and that it’s particularly well suited to designing and living my retired life. Flexibility and adjustment over rigid optimization.
A beginner cook thinks:
“I need the perfect recipe.”
An experienced cook thinks:
“Okay, what do I have? What’s working? What needs balancing?”
That’s retirement too. Reality is much more iterative than, “withdraw 4% per year, adjusted for inflation, for the rest of your life” – the flexible mindset says, “How much do I really need this year? How can I adjust if needed?” These parallels reach into all aspects of retirement:
markets dip → spend a little less this year or use some cash savings
health changes → maybe shift from adventure travel to comfort travel
loneliness creeps in → add more structure/community
new interests emerge → redirect time and money
Most of us who successfully navigated careers, families, and finances were already adapting constantly long before retirement. Life rarely follows the original plan exactly. You adjust. It’s what you do. Then retirement hits, and we are encouraged to settle into one set plan. But we’re better served by leaning into that ability to adapt.
My “cook with what you have” approach drives my best friend crazy. She’s a wonderful cook, but much more of a recipe follower. One Christmas while we were making Chex mix together, I was doing my usual loosey-goosey improvisation and couldn’t figure out why it tasted a little off. She finally looked at me and said:
“I know what it’s missing—a RECIPE!”
Honestly, she wasn’t wrong. Retirement probably works the same way. Some structure matters. Some planning matters. But eventually you still have to taste, adjust, and make the life in front of you work for you.
Kitchen Wisdom
Learn principles, not just formulas
Leave room for substitutions
Taste and adjust as you go
Don’t panic when the original plan changes
Trust the skills you built before retirement
Retirement isn’t about finding the perfect recipe. It’s about trusting yourself to keep adjusting the meal along the way.